It's Understood
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 Be Understood . The Newsletter of Emotionally Intelligent Communication 
November 2003 
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Greetings!

Welcome to the first edition of Be Understood, the newsletter of emotionally intelligent communication. We'll be providing you with a regular roundup of new thinking and concepts in communication - along with tips to help you add power to your own communication.

In this issue we look at . . .
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  • What's Emotionally Intelligent Communication?
  • EI's A Cool Idea, But What Do I Do?
  • The worst brings out the best
  • Illumination - New Ideas
  • Share these articles

  • EI's A Cool Idea, But What Do I Do?
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    A business leader's guide to building Emotional Intelligence

    You've re-engineered your processes to reduce costs and eliminate defects. You've automated every activity you can squeeze onto a computer. Your inventory is just in time. You've outsourced activities unrelated to your core business.

    You've formed strategic alliances with your suppliers. You consider customers partners in success. You've done scenario building and strategic planning and know where your company is headed. Your accounting procedures are so squeaky clean they sparkle.

    You've diversified your investment portfolio, your work force, and even your board of directors. You're balancing your scorecard. You've strengthened every link in the value chain. You may even be "living your brand promise" - though you're not genuinely sure what that means.

    In short, you've implemented most of the success formulas recommended in the business literature since you learned to read.

    Then along comes emotional intelligence. "Interesting idea," you say, "but what do I do with it?"

    Click here to discover how to use EQ at work . . . »

    The worst brings out the best
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    Bermuda, where I live, is still mopping up after Hurricane Fabian, a Category 3 (very serious) hurricane that struck, full-on, in September. It was loud, and long, and terrifying. Knowing Fabian was coming and that it would be closer and stronger than anything we'd ever experienced was sobering.

    Bermuda is very well prepared for hurricanes. Our homes are stone, with stone roofs that are hard to blow off. They can, and some did. Four people drowned when their cars were swept off a causeway, but most damage was to property, not people.

    As power and telephone were restored, house by house, people shared their hospitality along with stories of how they spent the Fabian hours. Lots of family conversations and candlelight Scrabble. Mid-storm, my mobile rang - a friend calling to say she'd grown enough from the experience and could we please do something else now. One hotel served a cocktail called the Fabian - with the little umbrellas blown inside out.

    At stressful times, we have to do our best to keep things light, while staying careful. We're in the middle of the ocean. There's nowhere to go. We can't drive out of danger. There's nothing we can do but make sure nobody's alone, close our shutters, count on our optimism and resilience, and ride it out. It's a good workout for our emotional intelligence.

    Illumination - New Ideas
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    Should recruiting be part of Marketing?
    That question was posed by workforce.com in its August 28th e-zine. The expert panel, drawn from assorted spots on the org chart, felt recruiting should remain part of Human Resources, yet they agreed that HR folk should understand and use marketing techniques. One panellist cited research suggesting "applicants rely on product or services marketing campaigns to form ideas of what it would be like to work in the firm." Having worked in both HR and Communication departments, I could never understand why HR and PR don't work together more closely.

    A company's brand, which includes what it stands for in the community, is as important to employees as it is to customers. Almost every company I've worked with has "employer of choice" somewhere in its mission/vision/vallues statements. And who's going to execute the "brand promise," so carefully crafted by the marketing team? It may sound trite and sloganish, but an organization's strength really is its people.

    New definition of marketing
    From the folks at MarketingProfs.Com comes the essence of marketing captured in a few well-chosen words. Marketing means solving customers' problems profitably. It puts the emphasis squarely on customers' needs.

    I often work with "reluctant marketers." They're mighty uncomfortable promoting themselves and their services. "Marketing feels so, well, not me!" To help them discover how to promote their work in an authentic way, I have them answer these questions.
    - Is your service good?
    - Will people enjoy or benefit from your service?
    - Is your price fair?
    - Will you do a good job for them?
    - Will people know about this service if you don't tell them?
    - What's the worst thing that can happen if you tell them?
    - Can you view telling people about your service as an act of kindness?

    The truth is, selling isn't about you - it's about your customers. When you focus on what's good for them and the ways you can help them, then, "Marketing feels so, well, like normal human communication!"

    Share these articles
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    The contents and articles of this e-zine may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without charge for nonprofit and educational purposes provided the following paragraph is included:

    "Reproduced, with permission, from Be Understood, the newsletter of It's Understood Communication, http://www.itsunderstood.com"


    What's Emotionally Intelligent Communication?
    For reasons unknown, I watched the season finale of The Amazing Race. In a TV genre generally devoid of any intelligence, I was shocked to see one team make brilliant use of emotional intelligence. When there was negotiating to be done (dealing with airlines, cab drivers or disinterested strangers) one partner did the talking. His gift for seeing things from the other person's point of view and his sensitivity to the context and constraints let him build collaborative relationships with everyone he met. And he was unafraid to know and show his own emotions.

    It was no surprise this pair finished first. Being an emotionally intelligent communicator gives you a fair advantage.

    Emotional Intelligence (EI) is the ability to use emotions (our own and others') in deciding how to act. It comes into play in almost every aspect of our lives.

    I discovered the EI concept working on a leadership project for a Bermuda bank. Competency research led me to Richard Boyatzis, which led to Primal Leadership, a book he co-authored with Annie McKee and Emotional Intelligence author Daniel Goleman. Their work supported what I'd learned interviewing top performers to see what made them different from Mr. & Ms. Average. I called it people skill; they called it EI.

    At the core of EI is communication that builds shared understanding and a common foundation for thought and action. People who do this well may be no smarter than average, yet they're more successful.

    Since then, I've studied EI theory and discussed it with many others, including members of Susan Dunn's "EQ Alive" group (link below). The more I learn, the more firmly I believe communication is at the heart of success, for organizations and individuals alike.

    In Be Understood, I'll be sharing some of my learning and thinking on the subject of emotionally intelligent communication. I invite you to share yours, too.

    Read Primal Leadership the book that got me interested in Emotional Intelligence.

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    . Links to related topics . . .

    Read Sue's EI article from Journal of Employee Communication Management

    Learn more about EQ - Visit Susan Dunn, the EQ Coach

    COMING SOON - Does PowerPoint make us stupid?
    Meanwhile, take our PowerPoint Poll

    Sue will be presenting "Talk To Me: Face To Face Communication For Managers" at the ASTD Bermuda conference November 1

    VISIT IT'S UNDERSTOOD ON THE WEB

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